I think in the time that I hurt I forgot a lot of things. The obvious things would be myself, my strength, my value, and my morals. I lost a lot of myself in chasing other people’s dreams and trying to impress people who didn’t care to give me another glance. We’ve all gone through that.
But I forgot a lot more than just that. I forgot about compassion and what it feels like to genuinely care about others’ lives. I forgot that friends like to see a text from me once in a while. I forgot that when I’m angry, not everybody understands that it doesn’t have to do with them, it’s me not being able to cope with what’s around me. I forgot that even though you give yourself time (maybe too much of it) to feel sad and ‘heal’, time doesn’t come back, and eventually you’re just wasting it. I forgot to pray and thank God every day for waking me up to a free country, a good education, a big house, and a loving family…. because I forgot what it felt like to be motivated to live. I forgot that people like to see me smile. I forgot that I liked to smile. I forgot that I was smart, creative, and kind. I forgot that he couldn’t take that away from me.
We go up and down mountains through our whole lives. I used to care about where I was on the mountain. If I was at the top, I was screaming to the world that I and it were awesome. When I was at the bottom, I thought I’d never see the top again. Now, I want to appreciate everything. The climb itself is great. The top is beautiful, but maybe there’s some beauty at the bottom and at the plateau. God bless everyone on their travels.