New Girl

You’re saying “only” this new girl as if you didn’t love me, as if you didn’t beg for me to just look at you, as if it wasn’t us against the world in a little engineering room. You’re saying “only” because you’ve blocked me outta your memory, some image of us in a self-contained factory,…

Forever

I replaced all my dreams with you. The crushed velvet and the satin kisses, the way your body wrapped around mine, the way you said ‘forever’ and then fell asleep. Do not tell a young girl ‘forever’. Young girls still believe in fairy tales.

Purpose

The purpose of the blinking phone is to make you feel alive in a world that’s been dead for years. And not some metaphorical bullshit, like literally a dead world. A dying world, more like it. A world that repeats itself over and over again with the patterns of fear, gluttony, pride, and then decay…

“Yes”

It’s a simple word, but the only one that opens doors to opportunities you wouldn’t otherwise experience. Considering I’m an introvert and already lack ‘alone time’, it’s extremely easy to put off plans and to tell people that I’m too busy. Lately I’ve been facing a lot of distance from my friends, though, and the…

Do Nots and Go Forths

Do not be intimidated by the negatives in life. Do not be intimidated by the ‘should nots’ and ‘could nots’ and ‘have nots’ and ‘be nots’ because angels say ‘do not be afraid’ and ‘be ye not conformed to this world’. Do not let the ‘do nots’ and the ‘shall nots’ prohibit you. Do not…

Faces of Fear

“Take me by the hand.” But my hand feathered away, stripped of all flesh, and he didn’t want just the veins. Splash, crash – and the noises only get louder, only dive further into the fear that I am falling, drowning, though I am far from the pool’s end. I am far away from danger,…

death

You didn’t hear the knell when it tolled but you felt the weight of the world lifting from your own, and that’s when you discovered that death is an unkind word for freedom.

New Years Rant

Happy New Year!!! It’s approximately 4 a.m. and I’ve been up nearly 24 hours and I’m still a little drunk while writing this. Good start. In short, my new years kiss never showed up, which led me into a whirlwind of harmful memories of past lovers and then some even more harmful self-shaming thoughts. Amid…