You are the Stars

You are the stars. You are not like the stars in that you shine bright, are made of helium, or are so distant. You are the stars because stars become ideas when we gaze upon them. We make wishes when they fall and we count them when we’re sad. They are not, to us, just…

Mountains and Skyscrapers

A film over your eyes with glazed images of mountains, forests, and skyscrapers. Take two seconds to breathe life in, and then twenty minutes have gone away. But you want those two seconds to feel like twenty minutes, and you want the twenty minutes back. You are a jilted customer, but you cannot buy more…

Bleed

When I first met him, my nails dug deep into my palms and I bled. I bled a lot. In my dreams, in my room, and when I went on the train. It stained my clothes and exhausted me. So I bandaged myself up with stitches and gauze. I couldn’t feel his touch, couldn’t hear…

Songs and Steamboats

I didn’t ask for the old woman to sing, and yet she did anyway – eagerly. Her voice did not carry her age, and her lips did not weigh her down like her knees do. Singing, with careful notes and a loose tongue. This is how steamboats sail on water, and this is how birds…

Tea Bags and Rivers

Don’t you see that you are not the river? You are the brewed, brown, sodden tea bag in the mug. Choose the leaves carefully, because someone sips from your mug, and they may forget to add sugar.   You are not the river. Rivers bathe over people. You fill them.

gods

The ancient gods died because we didn’t believe in them anymore. How vain it is to make something exist, to create things from imagination, to claim ourselves gods by believing in false ones. But what of my thoughts and my dreams? Am I the devil when I dream, or am I a god? When you…

the man who took you

You cannot love the man who took you. You can smile at his Facebook posts and his funny shirts. You can remember funny jokes you made. You can try to forgive him, try to make up excuses, try to tell yourself you’re overreacting. But monsters creep out at nighttime, and you were unconscious. And he…

What Anxiety Has Done FOR Me

I had coffee today, which spikes my anxiety, which was a bad decision obviously. And though anxiety sucks ass, it forces me to shift my perspective. Anxiety is a way of thinking that leads you to think of the worst-case-scenario. It’s so easy to just go, “Yea, my anxiety sounds right. I definitely fucked up….

How to Actually Overcome Fear

A while ago, I told a little story about my time on a flight leaving Helsinki and the kids that treated the turbulence like a roller coaster. Their perspective of the situation really aided the not-so-few of us on the flight that were overwhelmed and panicky about the turbulence. The story I told really focused…